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Category Archives: Children Jokes
Being a first grade teacher can be very amusing. It’s especially entertaining to hear how they describe what’s going on in the family. For instance, when Harry told be that his mom was having a baby, he was glowing! He was so excited that he reminded me about it every day. Suddenly, one day, he didn’t mention a word about it. Out of my concern I questioned him why. “Well”, he replied, “last night my mom told me that I can feel the baby moving in her stomach, I’m afraid she must have eaten it!”
“Why is the bride wearing all white?” asks the little child to her mother.
Her mother replies, “White is the color of purity and happiness, and today is the brides happiest day.”
The little girl thinks about that for a moment and then asks, “So why is the groom wearing all black”?
A little girl comes running into the kitchen a few days before Christmas.
“Mom, guess what, you know how I’ve been asking you for a stroller for my doll for Christmas.”
“Yes,” her mother slowly replies.
“Well, you don’t have to get me one, we already have one, I just found one under your bed! Could you get me a doll house instead?”
A priest is talking to a little boy at the end of the days service.
“So your Mom says prayers with you before you go to sleep, what prayer does she say?
The boy responds, “Well, usually she just says, Thank God he’s in bed.”
A little girl is watching her mother in the kitchen. She notices some strands of her mothers hair are tuning white.
“Mom,” she asks “Why is some of your hair turning white?”
Annoyed, her mother responds “Because I have a little girl who is constantly making trouble and causing me to worry.”
The little girl thinks about it for a few minutes and says, “Mom, so why is Grandma’s hair all white?”
It’s Christmas morning and five-year old John has finished opening his gifts.
Unfortunately for John he has received lots of clothes and not as many toys as he was anticipating.
“John, where are you going?” His mother asks.
“Upstairs to my room,” he answers dejectedly, “to play with my new scarf.”
Laura, a proud grandmother, has her little granddaughter visiting her for the weekend. They go out for lunch to the local cafe where Laura’s friends like to eat. Joan comes over to their table and tells Laura, “What a beautiful granddaughter you have!” Laura replies, “This is nothing, you should see the pictures.”
Laura is telling Jill, her new neighbor about her kids and grandkids. After a bit she asks Jill about her children. Jill replies, “We don’t have any children.” Genuinely shocked, Laura blurts out, “But what do you do for aggravation?”
Conversation between Grandmother and Granddaughter:
Grandma, where you on Noah’s Ark?
Well, how did you survive the flood?
Money isn’t everything but it sure does help keep you in touch with your children!