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Category Archives: Jokes For The Student
“Well, I think the time has finally come,” the professor sadly exclaimed. “As you all know, I was visiting the Dean as he was on his deathbed, and as he took he his last breaths in this world, he put great effort into writing me a message onto a piece of paper. I could see how difficult just jotting down the message was for him, and then he signaled to me to come and take the paper from him. I have been waiting,” the professor said emotionally, “to share this message with all of you, the students of this University in which he took so much pride in. I will now read his words to you, which I myself have not yet read.” With that the professor unfolded the piece of paper he had been holding onto since the death of the Dean, and read in a loud clear voice for all the students to hear, ” You are standing on my oxygen wire, MOVE!”
The absentminded Biology teacher started off his class by saying, “Today we are going to dissect a frog.”
He unwraps some paper at his desk and reveals a sandwich.
After a bit of silence he mutters, “That’s funny I distinctly remember eating lunch earlier!”
Kid to Teacher:
Well I was watching my dog so he wouldn’t eat my homework….but then my hamster went and shredded it for his nest.
Funny Teen Girls Conversation Overheard in School
Teen Girl to Friend: “For the prom, I’m renting a limo, spending $500 on a new dress and bringing in the best makeup artist in the state to do my hair.”
Teacher who has overheard the conversation: “Wow, that’s more than I spent for my wedding!”
Teen Girl: “Yeah, well you can get married three or four times, but a prom is a once in a lifetime experience.”
Joan, a third grade teacher was speaking privately with one of her students at their desk.
It soon became obvious that the boy in the next desk was listening to the private conversation.
“Do you know what ‘mind your own business means’?” She asked him sarcastically.
From across the room a boy shouted, “I do! I do!”
Q. How many Harvard graduates does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. Just one. He grabs the light bulb and waits for the world to revolve around him.